id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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