y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
