Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
