you're like a bully in the Christmas story
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
