There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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