Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
