I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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