Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
