If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
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