Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
