i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
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