Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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