In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
