that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Randomize