Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Randomize