when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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