You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Randomize
