You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Randomize
