i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
