She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
