When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize