your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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