they need to just BURY HIM!
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
