Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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