What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
