I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
