Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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