i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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