You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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