Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize
