found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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