so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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