How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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