Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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