I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
