I feel like I'm in dance class right now
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
this is an emotional support booty call
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
You've changed since you got that strap on
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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