u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Randomize
