ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Randomize
