let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Randomize
