She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
