im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
