chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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