Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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