You smell like stripper and shame
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Watching her eat just hurts me
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
