I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
