honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
i think my mom watched the whole time
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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