i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
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