I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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