Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
People in love make me want to vomit
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
