ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
farters have to be the big spoon...
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Randomize
